He didnt want me to de on his watch I receive the same treatment now from many of the same people just like him. So many times. They do so just to make themselves feel better and to elevate themselves above her, she claims. Specifically the first part. I see no hope. At the same time, I think it could help people to read your stance and understand how someone can appear at peace with their choice to die by suicide. A safety plan? I stopped and decided that no one could ever hurt me as much as I was willing to hurt myself. Theres saying in AA: when you sober up a horse thief, what you get is a sober horse thief. You are just as special as she is and probably so much more you just dont see it in yourself. So patronising and disrespectful. I honestly think it would be better if I died but I know that this will affect others around me so a word of advice thats coming from a kid. It wears me out But gravity always wins , work, relationships and so on. Keep your water bottle capped after drinking. Its after 11 pm and he isnt home again, Im going crazy not knowing where he is or who he is with. I think you and your son would benefit from counseling, as it seems you are both really good at internalizing the failings of others. But I know that anything I can do to make things better needs to start with where I am now. He was looking for sex. But I have found the possibility of our souls continue beyond death very comforting. In my 30s I had CVA Stroke I couldnt work anymore. I have life insurance to leave for my children when I die. Well, its very lonely and hard to motivate myself to be happy. Fucking pathetic. Lets always remember each other. My condition gets worse every week, but theres nothing I can do about it. My life is worth nothing to anyone and I am plagued by being fat, ugly and stupid among many other things. Amazon offers three options: yellow Baby Shark, blue Daddy Shark, and pink Mommy Shark. Developed during WWII by a British solicitor, the board game was patented under the name Cluedo in 1947, and then sold in North America under the name Clue starting in 1949. So hang in and first ask yourself if you are up for this heroic journey, meeting your soul mate, best friend, and partner in this earthly life time. you want me to take my life to prove in my loyalty to you. The Sad Truth about Passive Suicidal Thoughts and Actions. So what if shes seeing her family, too! Either way I lose. I feel the same. Also struggling with addiction issues which is a nice crutch until it isnt. Solitude and self healing get far easier when you can accept this. I can feel happiness. Im terminally ill but dont want to seek treatment (its curable) because Im hoping it will kill me sooner rather than later. I do love him, but not in a girlfriend/wife sort of way. Its a lot of fun and oh Ive been trying to do is get help for so long and I lost hope a while ago, I just cant do it anymore. Have been wanting to kill myself for almost 5 years. I have only ever heard of one person who that happened to (at the age of 57). that each day please try to ask yourself for finding one good thing , no matter how small it is. Do not buy dairy products that are not properly sealed. Have rods in my back. Im there with you Tina. It wears him out I know I wouldnt be having as difficult time as I am, if I had just avoided meds altogether. Thank you for your words. I have just prayed for you. Dear Elizabeth But I also know this: a wise man once wrote: Dont believe everything you think. This must be especially true of someone suffering with both depression and PTSD. And so i loved reading. So, those left behind could still interact and not miss us. Finally, there are sources of help, such as online counseling. Selfish, as in the act of suicide has inherent disregard to your family or friends. Thanks for sharing here! Im 21yo. It turns into days of him making me feel bad, threatens to leave, blames it all on me. Why he took my sister who was loved by all, and had so much to live for. From the moment Ive woken up even as a child. Youre wasting a golden opportunity. I spent 16 days in the hospital. I once told a friend opine that it would be cool if everyone had cool cars and he replied saying that then those cars wouldnt be consider cool. But do you have friends or neighbours who have lost someone they were close to? All other trademarks are the property of their respective owners. Im going through that now so many times Ive had to deal with depression. Maybe this is the way God wants it to be. Some very young woman, maybe 20 tops, was who I saw. I was a highly functional white collar worker, with everything. Our quality and service at a very competitive price will provide the solution you desire. Truth is, nobody wants to hear your problems. I always appreciate your participation on the site. But being homeless, doesnt afford these basic things. Dont be like me! Were along for the ride, so lets enjoy the show while we can. In the very likely chance I was lied to and given HIV I have already made plans to do experimental treatment and if that doesnt work or get any scientific advances for others infected or myself then I decided Im not going to go down the road of suffering HIV often brings with it. Yes, I am Suicidal. Ever since my parents started getting older Ive been afraid of outliving them and being left alone by myself for decades living a pointless existence without the people I love. Thanks for sharing here. My home my car utilities. The PIC is usually not present on packaging films, as it is not practical to collect and recycle most of this type of waste. My brother also refused to take any kind of test to prove his innocence while I readily agreed. Do not open refrigerator or freezer doors more often than necessary to avoid temperature fluctuation. You are no longer an American here. Know that feeling well. If you have to PAY someone to listen to you, your wasting your time and money. And thats because I havent been wearing it for so long that people started to worry with how fast they ride. If you are hellbent on dying, just wait it will come for sure. I find it alarming to learn that even passive suicidal ideation is a danger sign, since I do, on occasion, have such thoughts. If you only knew my thoughts you would be disgusted. @Leslie, nobody, anonymous and others. I know alot of people never get told that in their life! I am that much good at studies as an average student must be, and all of my teachers only praise those who brought 90%+ marks in their board 10th grade exams. My advice is to leave him. It would be much better for everyone if I just wasnt here. I just wish that my sleep could be longer and longer. Ive gone through life hating myself and humiliating myself, because I treated all the hurtful or dismissive things people said to me when I was a child as incontrovertible facts. I work 6 days a week to get away from them. I realize that if you want to die, you might welcome such news. I make all these afghans, only to throw them in the trunk of my car, but keeps my hands busy. Have I thought about it since? WebInnovation in food and beverage packaging is mostly driven by consumer needs and demands influenced by changing global trends, such as increased life expectancy, and fewer organizations investing in food production and distribution. He was only joking, but at the time, I took it much too seriously and used to think, No! For nothing and no one. Look at the world today and see what is happening out there. If youre lucky enough to break free once, its never for long (at least not with the bipolar diagnosis). My only sibling left hates me and so does his Son. Theres no solid reliable way of dealing with it. I really dont want to be here anymore, Im just tired, of all the bad in this world Its sad. Please get some help. She died of lung cancer in August. Even after he got sober, finally, he was still a controlling asshat. The tiredness that comes from continuing to live. Although Ultra Heat Treated (UHT) milk can be stored at room temperature until its expiry date, it should be kept chilled once it is opened and consumed within a week. Maybe a therapist who can understand and is trained to listen and validate your feelings will help you as well? Love and prayers! There are different things, like therapy and possibly medication, and more, that can help you to feel better about yourself and life. Youre taking on a lot of other peoples failings and making them your own. I am in the same boat as you. thats sounds somewhat similar to how i felt recently, so ill try to give you advice. Do not leave the door of display fridges open while you take your time to select food items. If you only have one cutting board, always wash it thoroughly with soap and hot water between uses. in response to Linda. I am on my way to a real dark place, I am so alone and dont see any light. But hes gone from this life. Copyright 2020 byStacey Freedenthal, PhD, LCSW. silence may be the tremendous peace of the waves gently brushing against the sand.. we are all part of the cycles of Nature, albeit in this machine world. After all the therapy and personal work, it was only by reading my anti suicide affirmations and confronting each passive or active suicidal thought, that I was finally able to stop them and find peace. I have severe OCD and major depressive disorder which is semi-managed through medication and therapy, but it feels like too little, too late at this point. If not, please consider calling the national lifeline at 800-273-8255 or texting the crisis text line at 741741. . I had thought that I was doing well, compared with where I had been for much of the last couple of years, because I had managed to go for nearly four weeks without a meltdown. I would upvote this if I could. I really did try. My life got better when I learned to accept that. After all, both you and they will change so much over the years to come that anything might happen. You may feel that your family would be better off without you but how do you know they feel the same way? You say you are grieving the loss of your daughters and husband, but I dont know the precise situation: whether your husband has walked out on you, or is dead, or whether youre still living in the same house as him but in a loveless marriage. I am tired of this life and also wish I could just go. Once exposed to these forces, our positive defence mechanisms kick in. Getting drunk and sitting outside in freezing temperature. And showing Ms Big Mack Stacks, I might just be a cheeseburger but its the Hot Fudge Ice Cream that I offer in my relationship that Im looking to spoil you with. Sometimes even old friends are no longer, we can very easily have grown apart. She also creates a false dilemma either I diminish you or you diminish me by claiming that making a loser of everyone else is the only way to maintain [an] illusion of superiority. Hard work, achievement and helping others have always given my self-esteem a boost, without any such illusion, and not at the cost of anyone elses self-esteem. I am sorry for your pain and hope that therapy can show you a more positive approach to controlling your life. The only problem was that I realized that I felt good as I was tying the noose. Ensure the centre of meat and poultry are well-cooked as partially cooked food increases risk of bacterial growth. Dont look back or even feel bad! Eyes become red and cloudy when the fish loses freshness. The only thing that keeps me going is my dog. My mother passed 6 months ago and Im still mourning her loss. When freezing cooked food, make sure they are wrapped tightly. If I hear Youre not alone as a reason to stick around one more time, it may actually speed things up for me. My wife who was my only friend is giving up hope that Ill get better or be my old self again. I have a plan, I have a method, and Im putting my affairs in order. You are not alone and your life is not valueless. Its all energy. Thank You for the exception, and Thank You for youre reply. Request for food to be thoroughly cooked to kill all bacteria. I just dont enjoy life anymore. M Measurable So again, please be careful with who you talk to about how you are feeling, this country is really good at making your problems worse, and hurting you further. Washing and cleaning are simple measures that anyone can take to ensure food safety. Here are, Planning to read more in the new year? And not having to get another home of your own with not enough money. i only weigh about 125 pounds i am 6foot 3 inches I look like a skeleton feeble and weak and people take advantage of that it does not matter what i do or say people are animals they pick on and destroy the weak and lame etc. And life is bigger than art and mind-ways. This is known as cross-contamination. When America entered World War II a few years later, the U.S. government purchased millions of special View-Master reels and used them to train servicemen on how to spot planes and boats within shooting range. I just didnt want to live without them. I am feeling the same as you even Im only 25, Im convinced that am a burden and it would be better for me to be gone. And I will. Clarification? Properly defrosting food is an important step in food safety especially if you work in a food business. You could pull, twist, throw, beat, and bend Stretch Armstrong, but you couldnt break him. By the time their 1990 live-action movie dropped, the turtles had utterly conquered the youth market with bestselling toys and box office numbers to show for it. For more information, click here. Perhaps some of us need to learn how to learn how to love ourselves not in narcissistic manner, rather to appreciate what we actually contribute. I live in a different country to you so its not possible for me to come help you. Talking to someone by itself doesnt heal most of these problems, I agree but that doesnt mean that suicide is the only answer. For example, an old lady I used to look after in a nursing home spent most of her time knitting dolls and Christmas decorations to sell at fundraising events, but for this she needed to buy yarn and stuffing. Long story as short as possible, I helped the 300lb man who had extensive health problems including diabetes lose 68 lbs and get off several medications. So in some way you are blessed, you saw the beyond. Insurance has destroyed health care! So, as Linda Straubel said in another comment here, Dont believe everything you think.. Why dont you just be honest with her? I recently lost my job because the company went out of business. From conversations arising from these incidents, after they had calmed down, they devised coping strategies to deal with stress. There are online support groups for people who are experiencing suicidal thoughts, such as the forum at chronicsuicidesupport.com, and the Facebook group Depressed and Broken. I havent participated in these groups and thus cant attest to how helpful they are (or arent). And not like him who finished PhD , worked and now lets himself to drink until he die. Sometimes it seems like its working sometimes it doesnt the percentage of networking is higher in the percentage of working I want to go back to work I have an eight year college degree that I cannot use because of my emotional trauma I cant control if I could just be useful I would not feel like I want to die. Annie, I wanted to reply to your latest message with the details of your life, but theres no reply button there, so Im going back to your original message. If he cant pull his own weight physically and emotionally, leave him. I tried to talk to a therapist but since Im so good at putting on my happy mask she thinks its nothing to worry about. One part Twister and one part musical chairs, the game challenges children to find their way to marked pads on the floor before the electronic caller instructs everyone to freeze. You might consider online counseling; I think it would help you. Seriously, nobody knows what to do with you when you ask for help. I have no one with me, other than my fantasies and myself. Ive been suffering for almost 8 years or more idk, Forgive me I have no one to talk with even my garbage doctor. sounds like you have had a lot to deal with in life. and what best about this comment section is that it is coming from people who DO understand bc they are coming from the same boat. So you can see that the suicide rate is 20 times higher for people who seriously consider suicide, but its still extremely low. I have the physical pain of osteoarthritis and fibromyalgia, among other illnesses. I constantly wait for that day to approach. But, I think theres light at the end of your tunnel. I feel like you say, just not wakeup. I differ in that I have no pain, no problems health or otherwiseI just dont feel any reason to go on. I really would like to sleep forever and never wake up. do some activities together. I dream about! Thank you. Turn your frustration, well try to turn it around by looking at the positive. It makes you feel crazy, alone, uncared for and more hopeless. These are all just random suggestions, not all of which will be relevant to you. time to swim with the flow and just go over the waterfall and die! Your story, your courage will help me keep going. Thank you. It may be contaminated with harmful mycotoxins. The purpose of my website is to provide information, not counseling or treatment. Tired of being so angry that I relish the wrong person bother me about that filthy rag that I cant keep on my face because Ill definitely beat the hell out them or hopefully kill them. Im at a point that I cannot snap out of this. Ironically, Ive found researching my own psychological issues have helped me to understand them and feel less ruled by them. Sweetheart, I am so sorry to hear what youre going through. What I see in society is we carry emotional/ physical loads. Talking with counselors makes it more troublesome on my end. You can find a form for completing a safety plan here. but, it still circles the main universal purpose of eat to live or be eaten. For one thing, and frankly I dont know how well-supported this theory is, but Ive read that people contemplating or even attempting suicide are unconsciously fulfilling their parents wishes. Ive struggled with depression and suicidal ideation my whole life. I am 57 I am the second oldest in my training group doing a fairly physical job pay is unbelievable off the scale I too felt exactly like you in very much same situation its as if I had written that comment myself. And people always applaud the heros that stepped in to help. They just kinda stop talking to you. Raw food can contain dangerous micro-organisms, which can cause foodborne diseases. Im a logical practical person , and i look around the horrible world and all the suffering and evil (99 percent caused by people) and i think this is not my world i expect and was promised better as a child. Whats the first rule of war , If you cant win ,dont fight. .. But at the same time all I can think about is they would probably be better off without me because Im not even being a good mother or wife in the first place and I have nothing good to offer to them anyways! Death of my GF suddenly or driving down the road an then all of a sudden a 11 year old boy is hit by a car a lands right in front of me an dies, maybe its when Im waiting for the transit bus an it comes late but it doesnt matter because 7-8 gang bangers leave me for dead in the middle of the road, Or is it the loss of my brother by suicide or could it be my wife who cheated an then divorced me, Maybe its just it all an now my mom has dementia an blames me for things lost or just anything, Just maybe it could be me; being all alone. Foster black kid x marine divorced with masters and wish to not wake up each night plus i hate the states. 23 and not being able to carry out a single task in life in a mature way and now not being able to kill myself either. Since you asked, I myself have been there but everyones experience is unique, so my experience doesnt give me insight into everyone elses. I feel your pain , you are not alone. My situation is too complex to explain here. After an hour or so, I repeat this. If youre one of those people, you probably dont think of yourself as suicidal. They send the police and haul you to the psych ward which is locking you up, ignoring you, giving you crayons and scrap paper and then give you a hearing after 5 mns or less with a doc. I was too young to understand that marriages have hills and valleys. Please find a focus or a goal to work towards something positive to think about. You might not be able to read this comment and Im not entirely sure what spurred me to write this either. There may come a day when youre happy you did not succeed. Your situation sounds so very painful. Large companies like Omaha Steaks can make shipping perishable products look easy, but as a small food producer, selling perishable food online - especially frozen or refrigerated food - can feel a bit more daunting. Food in damaged packaging can be contaminated by micro-organisms. I just want this all to end. Mental health n passive suicide n all that goes with is very serious to which more understanding is needed from others as they do not have any idea what its like ! my Apologies, I didnt mean to make it sound like I was claiming a pill doesnt fix a chemical imbalance in your brain. I cant even move into it to live. what is even more satisfying is how easy it is to overdose on something. Hi Raymond, many of us of the boomer generation are forced to resign early from the profession due to current push for global technocratic agenda, and the pandemic accelerated it. We all are going to die. My reputation is one of absolute integrity when it comes to that and people know they can trust me to keep their confidences confidential. Take Care. Grieve cry beat up boxes get it all out and maybe one day you will feel better. He goes by many names, only some of which are correct. You may be at higher risk than average for death. A footnote in Microsoft's submission to the UK's Competition and Markets Authority (CMA) has let slip the reason behind Call of Duty's absence from the Xbox Game Pass library: Sony and I feel they dont really care or think you are just being lazy, attention seeking, something. All these things Ive learned along my path and theyve gotten me further than I ever expected. Since then my life has turned upside down all things that were working for me have now been detected all devices anything with technology due to getting hacked. But if I were your husband and you died, Id be devastated. I hope I am right. I am in Michigan. I tell myself every day I have no reason for living anymore. My Brother at 50. All of my lab tests came back good recently. By far, concerns for family are one fo the most common reasons why people do not act on their desire to die; I write about other reasons in my article What Are Your Reasons for Living?. I dont know whether that will always be the case anyones health fluctuates, and medicine is advancing. To talk with someone immediately, please consider calling the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255. The other night i was in so much distress, crying self to sleep, again, everything sucks and so alone, and so much crushing responsibility (still raising kids and i love them so much it makes it worse because they deserve so much better than how our life is) and it somehow occurred to me that God gave each of us someone who cares, whose entire mission it is to care: our guardian angels. 1, published by Louis Giraud and Theodore Brown. They dont even give you a test to determine if your serotonin (or dopamine) is low, before they get out their prescription pad and write you a mind numbing, sole crushing drug, that leaves you in worse shape than you are already in. And therapists bound to stick to a short course (because there are so many more people on the waiting list) can sometimes stick to a prescribed script of suggestions that are statistically likely to help the majority of patients, without listening to THIS patients problems and understanding why what the therapist is saying isnt helpful. (Yes, life is horrible, but there are so many good things too.) This but is an automatic response to negative, horrifying insights. I cannot sleep, I am in constant pain emotionally and physically. i dont think i want to kill myself, but i cant stop hurting over and over. im 25 y/r now. Based on this logic, she blames family, friends and therapists for her feeling diminished and isolated. I read this on a University website last week. I know, because before I went through it, I did not understand. A Doctor is going to ring me in a couple of hours, and I really dont know what to say to her or him. Plastics of Particular Concern: Polystyrene. I feel damaged person. I always thought that if youve no intent, as in you arent going to carry out the plans you have, its not considered suicidal. This bestselling plushie is soft and cuddly, helps children with emotional communication, and is reversible with a happy face on one side and an angry face on the other. I know everyone dies eventually anyway, but that doesnt mean that someone dying sooner than necessary ever feels as though its for the best for the bereaved partner. This compromises the safety and quality of the food. Because if you love them eventually theyll hurt you or abandon you. I believe the souls/spirits of our loved ones continue, they are still with us watching over us ( check out near death experiences and after death communication). Cross-contamination of food can cause food poisoning. Im sorry you hurt yourself and suggest that speaking to a therapist would be more helpful than talking to coworkers who are not professionals. Ive tried everything and nothing helped. I spend so much time in our living room where I held her hand while she passed away. I had hoped that something would have come up and I could sacrifice myself and my boys could be proud of me and I can finally go, rest. According to legend, Parker Brothers first passed on Monopoly when it was pitched to them by creator Charles Darrow in 1933. Not sure where that is but I know it isnt here. I just dont have the courage to take my own life away. All of which is bunch of crap. I dont know whether any of these suggestions will help, but I hope you can find solutions that do. I feel that this time I really have to succeed, Ive exhausted the help and patience of everyone who have previously tried to help and truly hate myself and life in equal measure. I really appreciate your response. If Im remembering correctly, he was 51 at the time. My death, cant happen soon enough. Ive talked to therapists, psychiatrists, meditation, is exercise, and every medication available. My children dont really deal with me and I have no friends. Didnt speak to me about what I tried to do or never spoke of it again. Then, everything turned horrible again, but thats another story. He was 15 years my junior, and he passed away this past Feb). Thank you again Linda for hearing me and being empathetic. Why should we be forced into a World/Life that we never asked for? Sometimes it could be a permanent issue such as illness or whatnot. A review of studies about the use of hotlines, chat, and crisis text services found people consistently reported improvement after the conversation, including decreases in suicidality, improvements in wellbeing, receiving referrals, and developing self-care plans.. Thanks for sharing. I think of anti-depressants the same way. can i have that end now. Im sorry you are experiencing this. Some swear by meditation, even something as simple as candle concentration. Wash your hands before and after preparing food, especially raw meat, poultry and seafood and before handling cooked or ready-to-eat food. I hate people think they have it all. I could tell you stories of my screw ups that would curl your toes with laughter. Hand-written letters are, therefore, legitimate, but messages of love and support typed on a laptop and launched on Facebook, e.g., are dismissed as fake. And thats ok. You can be jel without hate. Waking up in pain everyday and not having anyone that cares about you. Reusable plastic food containers can be subjected to wear and tear after a period of use. Live crabs and lobsters should exhibit leg movements. I have no impact on anyone. WebEnter the email address you signed up with and we'll email you a reset link. But after the pain will be more pain here. My reason for living died. Just too much suffering. N I wont tackle your whole post, but I will debate this: I have these 2 lovely darling grandchildren that my son and his wife apparently dont think Im good enough for. Sanitise plastic cutting boards with chlorine or bleach solution. Sadman, very well put, I agree with you. Dairy products are rich in nutrients which are nourishing. Hi BARBARA HOW ARE YOU..I HATE THAT YOUR ALONE ..IF I CAN HELP BY JUST BEING YOUR TEXT BUDDY JUST TO BE BECAUSE I HATE FEELING ALONE ALSO 45 YR FEMALE. Not sure what else I can say. LOL He didnt steal horses, obviously, but he was still the same self-absorbed, lazy control freak sober as he had been drunk, just a lot less dangerous. Dear Kenneth, pain from our loved one can indeed be so great that we feel it cannot be healed. I see my life like a movie. I wish we had assisted suicide laws here in UK and Ireland. My beloved husband life partner since youth has suddenly passed on 8 months ago, and we had our retirement plan. Perhaps we crept further away from difficult human interaction as electronic interaction became more available. Was looking forward to retirement and travel, but the thought of all that alone, has no appeal, I too am very tired of this life, get that part. Bloody Hell, I survived after a long recovery and I was angry. You do have computer access, though, and that might make it possible for you to find an online doctor and an online therapist. Not too far away, just beyond the veil. Would cut out all these huge fees charged to travel to other countries for Euthanasia , when people have worked hard all their life paying taxes when they are healthy, Please somebody bring thus service to those who need it. Its a Food Handlers responsibility to understand the food safety hazards related to their job, ensure all steps are taken to help prevent food-borne illness and be properly trained in food safety. 1947: Tonka TrucksOriginal estimated retail price: $1. And I had hope for the future. Frustratingly, there is no such thing as a happiness transplant, but on the other hand, my brain probably has more chance of regenerating emotional stability than someones body does of regenerating kidneys, so in the meantime, I ought to work on improving my mental health until I am in a position to make a rational decision. Im very sorry for your pain and loneliness. I feel lost. I feel exactly the same way. 1995: Beanie BabiesOriginal estimated retail price: $5 and up. I am better than that. I grew up in an era where you helped your family. Youre just a self righteous survivor. For example, the introduction of nucleating agents improves the clarity and stiffness of a plastic polymer which allows it to be used for making rigid and clear containers that show-off the contents and appeal to consumers. The challenge, is to figure out which camp you are in. Bookman subsequently redesigned the product to the one we see today. Please God, bring me home to heaven. Cooked food stored in large, deep containers remain warm for a longer time. And, believe that animal abusers need to have the Same thing done to them!!! Even the principle that everyone should get an education has been twisted into Everyone has to compete to get better grades than everyone else, and be told that if they dont win, they cant get a well-paid job and their lives are meaningless., ON Nov. 1st I was talking to my daughter. Cooked food intended for consumption later should be separated from food to be served as soon as it is cooked. I have a friend whose email signature line reads, Dont believe everything you think. I dont know where he got it, but I remember it whenever I think everything is hopeless. So, if you have passive suicidal thoughts, please take good care of yourself. Be done with this world and so called life. I genuinely hope you all can find your comfort and support. I wish I could sleep and never wake up again. Please dont stop at one bad therapist. It seems, everyone has betrayed me. Yes I wanna die. Which makes me feel worse cause I dont want to fuck up his life. After we married, I learned that every single thing he told me about himself was a lie. In an extra-clever touch of ingenuity, Robosapien would imitate the iconic Rosebud scene from Citizen Kane every time you turned it off using the remote. Select fruits with aromatic smell and vegetables with crispy, fresh leaves, as well as tender and fleshy stems. What can I do? I hope you find help or at least someone pays for what theyve done. If I have one more idiot throw their god in my face, I probably wont have to worry about slogging through a life I dont want. You dont make the mistake either of assuming that life must ALWAYS be nothing but misery (which is how it can feel to some people), or believing that you are a bad person and deserve to suffer (which is what I sometimes tell myself, even though I know thinking like that doesnt achieve anything). I am broken. Its amazing, here we are in the 21st century, and the only thing the psych wards have to offer is serotonin, ECT, ketamine, or rTMS. Cant drive im isolated in a fucking town and its just shit. Such fishes can accumulate methylmercury in their flesh. This will sound stupid and childish, but I have a huge bug phobia. This is because large quantities of food would take a longer time to chill properly. Loving family near. Maybe its because you fear theyll judge you harshly like your mother would, but if you think theyre lovely, they wont; theyll understand and help you to cope with your feelings, including your fear of your mothers rejection. I feel a little lighter to share my feelings on this site but there are still a lot of things that terrifies me and make me suffer to bang my head in the wall or slap my own face 15 times on both sides for finding myself guilty for being alive and being a burden to everyone I know. I think most people want to live as long as possible? He beat me daily, and treated me horrible, but I forgave him in my heart because you have to know that theres something that person is struggling with that makes them so angry. I was terrified of being alone. Only way to get out of being abused or take my life! Has consumed me, left me just thinking and feeling different about people and life. It was also the only construction toy of its time to utilize a motor on special units, contributing to its allure. Disney couldnt keep up with demand, and moms at home began sewing their own dolls as an alternative. To become stronger. Going to bed every night wishing not to wake up in the morning, always so disappointed when I do and having to face another very long day of extreme anxiety and depression. are available to all people in distress, whether or not they think explicitly of suicide: hotlines, crisis text lines, online chat, and more. Thank you for your comment and your words of respect at the end. Do your children do any housework? As to the global pandemic, theres nothing you can do about that but stay safe and keep hoping for the future. Plus, its gas I need to save. Your heartbreak may be worse then. Me too, I guess that is a common thought. Your wife does not want you to starve and drink (this does not help). Take it from me you wanna see your kids each day and just be there for her. Lmfao. Yet, when it was over and the dust had settled, I knew it was the best decision Id ever made and my life has been 100% better off since. Shes 29 and wants to start a family I dont want her settling for me, my struggles and issues when she can have a better life w/o me. If you have achieved something good, you know it. But to much of a coward to get a gun and blow my head off. Suicide lines are pretty much useless and busy . My whole life! If I could be who you wanted from birth, apparently. Have you really tried 50 kinds of therapy? this is me, actually smile when I think of myself in a coffin and knowing I will sleep peacefully forever. Sometimes, our emotions overwhelm us and affect our thinking. Giving out numbers, suggesting people exercise and eat right, may work for some, maybe many. But this is so unlikely to happen. Im sorry youre hurting so badly. I wish I could die but thats somehow too selfish and I love my family. Hi G, Im so sorry to hear of how you feel and how so many things have not worked for you, leaving you feeling like all hope is lost. Using the same technology that Disney used for animatronic theme park attractions, Forsse equipped the top-selling bear with a cassette tape and moving facial features.